The Unseen Opportunity Of Shadow Service With Leighann Amanda

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On today’s episode, Leighann Amanda is joining us. Leighann is an amazing woman who has been working in relationships, trauma and moving through a lot of inner stories that hold people back in their romantic relationships, business, and enjoying the beautiful life that they live. I have had the pleasure of getting to know her over the last few years and working with her and her business and even being coached by her. She has this deeply intuitive insight that she can speak into people. Today on the show we are going to be talking about shadow service. This can show up in a lot of different ways in our businesses and detract from the value we create and experience. We are going to be digging into what shadow service looks like, what to do about it, and the hidden gifts and opportunities within shadow service.

Leighann Amanda is an Ontological Coach who focuses on relationships. Her life is about coaching and educating individuals, couples, teams, and businesses about what goes into cultivating amazing relationships; it goes beyond communication skills, conflict resolution, or respect. It’s about real, awakened, self-awareness and self-understanding, and living life from this place. Her commitment is that people meet themselves fully and thoroughly so that they can ultimately become their greatest selves, and create conscious relationships everywhere they go.

We discuss:

[02:41] Leighann shares her defining moment in high school.
[05:14] So many of us have these little things that are changing how we make decisions, how we see things, how we value ourselves, and what we see is valuable.
[06:29] We learn who to be based on our nervous system reacting to the world all of the time. Our nervous systems are also responding to every single situation. We are always growing, learning, and evolving into what our nervous system decides at the moment who we need to be to survive.
[07:32] We are always responding so we can keep surviving. That plays into the personality traits we evolve, where we believe our value is the best put, and how we can have belonging, acceptance, and love.
[11:37] The thing that you believe makes you win is something that becomes a part of your toolkit and is really valuable.
[11:41] Your winning formula is also the thing that will have you lose. If you are stuck to a particular way for how to win it will also be the thing that gets in your way.
[12:59] The event is not the trauma. The trauma is whatever gets stuck in your body that wasn’t able to get let go, be processed, or released.
[17:26] You can do your business by trying to attain worth or do your business from your gift. What is my contribution?
[18:31] On the way of solely serving from love, consciousness, or gift you will be in and out of serving from that and your value.
[19:02] Until you can get to a place where you feel fully safe to always be in love and service it is going to be a twisty turny road. Make peace that that is going to be your journey for the first bit and the best thing for you.
[19:53] The objections that people will give to working with you are your objections to working with yourself.
[21:29] Noone is going to accept you as a high ticket coach unless you can see this value and move through it in yourself.
[22:11] Ego-centric consciousness asks the question: what is my life purpose? The eco-centric consciousness asks what people need from me right now.
[23:10] Is my well-being being compromised for this? This would include sleep, diet, and exercise.
[25:43] We create overwhelm all the time.
[26:31] That wholeness and completeness is a felt sense that you can feel in your body.
[28:19] The things that we are afraid to share maybe the thing that uniquely sets us apart in our business and makes us so valuable.
[28:45] When we started getting that our value is not based on our ability to coach or support, how we show up for our clients will be more powerful.
[30:21] You are valuable no matter what. How we show up in service is vastly different when we don’t need our value dictated.
[32:21] There is so much opportunity in how we show up and how we understand our form of service.
[32:42] Shadow service isn’t bad. We are always automatically by default trying to survive this thing called life. The fact that we sometimes come from shadow when we are trying to make our way is okay. When we accept that as okay we can step forward in pursuit of who we truly are as entrepreneurs.
[33:33] Bring humor to this and remember play and compassion.